WHAT IS FEAR?

It has been a while since I have done this, so I might be a little rusty with my writing. Just bear with me please.

There was a blog that I had written back in September last year about fear. The first thing I had noticed was the extensive strikethroughs in the blog. I tried to remember why I did this.

Too many stories and scenarios that I had written about fear were personal, and therefore inappropriate for a formal blog. BUT WHO GIVES A F*%K?!

I wanted to remain honest and speak about my experiences, so let me explain and try to understand my relationship with fear.

I remember having a horrendously irrational fear of injections and vaccinations. Even going to get the COVID-19 jab for the first time made my stomach literally twist and turn until it felt like there was a gigantic pretzel inside me.

My hands were so clammy and sweaty, and my ego wouldn’t let me showcase my fear, it was still bubbling inside.

It didn’t help that there was a long ass cue to get the shot; all it did was make that pretzel grow bigger and gnarlier. Erghhh. 😦

When I was sitting in the chair, listening to the nurse telling me that I might feel a little soreness in my arm, I convinced myself to bear the ‘pain’.

In a matter of seconds, a little pinch and it was all done and dusted. I had built up so much anxiety and in about two seconds flat, it all vanished. Maybe it did feel like a lot of false evidence was appearing real in front of my eyes…

I am not sure what had happened… but I breathed a huge sigh of relief knowing that I had attacked and conquered a big irrational fear of mine.

IT FELT HELLA GOOOOOOD!

GANESH CHATURTHI

Ganesh Chaturthi marks the arrival of the Hindu God Ganesh, along with his mother Goddess Parvathi, on Earth.

Ganesh Chaturthi is a time where Hindus around the world chant Vedic hymns, Hindu texts and prayers. Fasting also occurs for an extended period.

These celebrations last for ten days. In India, on the last day, the idol of Ganesh is grandly carried in a public process with music and group chanting; whilst the idol is immersed in a nearby river or sea.

What is the significance of this, you hear yourself asking? It is believed that the idol of the God Ganesh made from clay is dissolved and returns to Mount Kailash to Shiva and Parvathi (his parents, FYI).

Lord Ganesh is celebrated as the God of New Beginnings and the Removal of Obstacles across those who worship the God.

Lord Ganesh is also the God of wisdom and intelligence…. And this is whom people often pray before the beginning of a new challenge, work or otherwise.

Throughout history, it is believed that the idea of Ganesh Chaturthi was initiated by Indian freedom fighter Lokmanya Tilak. In a way, he has championed the idea of celebrating the festival publicly as the means to bypass the colonial British government ban on Hindu gatherings.

It is probably worth mentioning that the ban on public gatherings to celebrate Ganesh Chaturthi did not last too long. Sounds obvious, but oh well. Some things have to be emphasised.

Now, these celebrations occur in homes across the globe. Families place small statues of Ganesh in their homes to worship them.

Whenever people are in doubt, Lord Ganesh is prayed to so our questions can be answered.

It’s safe to say that in these troubling days, being able to pray to God unreservedly can feel unusually freeing in the time of crisis, wouldn’t you say?

MAKAR SANKRANTI

“Live in the sunshine. Swim in the sea. Drink in the wild air.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Have you ever been even mildly curious about different festivals celebrated in various parts of the world? Well, one of these includes Makar Sankranti.

According to the Hindu calendar, every January, Makar Sankranti marks the first day of the sun’s transition into the Capricorn zodiac sign.

Sankranti signals the end of the winter solace, therefore obviously highlighting the first day of summer.

You will find that these festivals have been given different names around the country. But the essence and the spirit bring everyone together.

The most prominent activities to keep you occupied are kite flying and eating a stash full of sugary treats that really spike your body upwards. Did that make any sense…? Anyway, I’m sure you know what I am talking about.

As I said, one of the most crucial aspects of this festival is ensuring you inhale a bunch of sweets, but not just any sweet. Out in the west, people exchange a special sugary sweetmeat made from sesame seeds and jaggery. You greet each other and then shove the sesame seeds and jaggery into their mouths. Just taste the deliciousness… (And try not to break your teeth while you’re at it)

The other thing you will find yourself immersed in during this time is kite flying. To be completely honest right now, I have absolutely no idea why people fly kites on this day. Why not any other day? How do you know the wind will cooperate? Do you make the kite yourself? What happens if the kite tears itself in half? What do you do if it gets stuck in a tree? How the hell do even fly those damn things?

So many questions, yet we have so little time. Try flying a kite every January and what all the fuss is about 😉

RAKSHA BANDHAN

The invisible ties between sisters and brothers are the strongest bond.

Let us think about the events that occur in the Gregorian calendar. Have you ever realised that you celebrate Mothers Day and Fathers Day? Yet somehow, as a child, you just simply miss out on all the abundance of gift-giving and receiving that you could have gotten well before December?

Fortunately, the Hindu tradition has it covered because every year, they celebrate a festival known as Raksha Bandhan as you can see on top.

Time to break this whole thing down: to start with, what does Raksha Bandhan even mean, you ask? If you are not asking this question, you should be… Literally, it stands for the bond of protection, obligation and care.

All the sisters tie a thread with charms on the wrist of their brother. This symbolically protects them forever. The sisters then receive a gift whilst taking the responsibility of caring for their brothers for the rest of their lives. Tell me, do you ever celebrate these kinds of traditions?

Similar to a couple of other traditions, in a way, Raksha Bandhan celebrates the love brothers have for their sisters. But something for you to remember is this festival reflects the brothers’ protection against all evil influences; whilst praying for their long life and happiness.

To give a super tiny bit of history, for context… relax… Google has said that Raksha Bandhan had been initiated by Nobel laureate Rabindranath Tagore. More specifically, though, this article:

https://www.hindustantimes.com/more-lifestyle/raksha-bandhan-2019-significance-facts-and-history-of-the-festival/story-CgDtNFp8ZBwpPb6TuxzRrO.html suggests that he had started a mass Raksha Bandhan festival during the partition of Bengal in 1905. During this time, he encouraged Hindu and Muslim woman to tie a rakhi on the wrist of individuals from other communities, making them their brothers

No need to feel left out of this! Tie a rakhi to your brothers and sisters, and be safe, knowing their bond to protect you for the rest of their lives.

HOLI

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection”- Buddha.

In a nutshell, Holi is the festival of colours, the festival of love and the first day of the spring season. All bunched into one. Sounds pretty surreal right?

Well, to give you some background on what in the world Holi is, read along. It is a Hindu festival that celebrates the eternal love of the gods Krishna and Radha.

You will find that Holi for people is an opportunity for them to repair broken relations, meet new people, forgive and forget, play and laugh with others.

All of this happens while boatloads of colour are spontaneously being thrown and smeared on your face… You might also feel a couple of water balloons and water guns striking in your direction. It’s all fun and games… chill out.

If only you had the odds of going to a place where Holi is celebrated… man, would you have the time of your life! Colours will be thrown everywhere; there would be music, dance, food and drinks to keep you on a high. People drink ‘bhang’, which is literally a cannabis milkshake. No joke.

Can you imagine all these colours flying around, music blaring out of loudspeakers, plus you’re there chugging down a big glass of marijuana smoothie. Not that I have ever tried it… but I am sure you feel like you are on a whole new level.

In the west, Holi lasts from five to seven days. On the day of Holi, people heap piles of firewood in the neighbourhood where it is lit in the evening. Every household brings dessert to honour the fire god. It is every bit as spectacular as you might imagine.

Holi is a celebration of love and the end of evil days. Hope you feel the same when the time comes around.

Diwali Haiku

Lights flicker around

The good shall always triumph

Keep your faith alive…

Catch-22…

Have you ever been in a position where you could not attain something? Whether it is a car, clothes, a job, higher pay…

Did you ever keep on doing the same thing over and over again, whilst expecting a different result?

It could be because there is a dependent condition that is stopping you from going where you need to go. Hallelujah! You’re now stuck in a catch 22.

Without getting too technical about it, the phenomenon known as catch-22 is literally when you cannot escape some sort of circumstance because of a different but mutually dependent scenario (look it up peoples.)

The classic example sounds a bit like this: “how can I get experience until I get a job that gives me experience?” And for the people that have or are about to graduate from college, I feel you.

So that is pretty much what catch 22 is. But more importantly for you, if you are stuck in a catch-22, how do you get out of the cycle?

To be perfectly honest, there is no way out of a catch 22. In a sense, the best way is to let it be and move on from the situation.

One way is to make sure you move on is that you write a plan for yourself every single day, preferably the night before or as soon as you wake up. It cuts out all that thinking time and forces you to get doing.

Another way to get out of this head spinning scenario is to constantly challenge the status quo. In a sense, you have to row your own boat to get out of a certain situation, if that makes sense. Start small, and work your way up so that you can make a difference and a positive change around you.

Patience…

“Patience is a virtue.” I’m sure you’ve heard this sentiment in some form at some point in your everyday life. And it is one of those things that is easy to understand.

Yet somehow, people still desire things that give them an instant gratification. If it doesn’t, a whole heap of frustration pours out uncontrollably day and day out.

I bet this is because of ambition and a lot of the times, people find it difficult to balance these two aspects in their lives: patience vs ambition.

If you find yourself surfing and googling on the internet about how to stay the course and deploy some level of patience in your work, you will find that everything takes time to manifest into reality.

The reason why a lot of you might cringe at the word ‘patience’ is pretty obvious: you’re just working because you want to prove something to another person. Why? Well, that honestly is for you to figure out.

And I get it. At times, it may feel like the world is gonna end tomorrow, and honestly whilst living in the midst of a pandemic I agree with you on that one.  But seriously, regardless of your age, you have plenty of time to go after everything you’ve ever wanted.

It takes consistency and discipline to create the life that you’ve always wanted. And I am not going to act like I know all the answers. Cause I actually don’t.

For me, I just want to keep on writing. And learn by doing, because that is the best way I retain knowledge and information.

Practice and patience is what works for me personally, and I believe it is something that might work for you.

I get that not knowing what the future may hold makes being patient a real task. But I am sure that having perspective, taking your time and putting in the consistent, daily hard work can give you the satisfaction you’re looking for.

Try being a little patient next time. 247365.

Conformance…

Do you ever find yourself following the crowd like a sheep? Doing things just because everyone else is? Or would you rather be the lone wolf that hunts these sheep down?

It isn’t something to feel awkward about… everyone goes through a variety of different experiences that makes them want to conform. It is the tendency to adjust one’s thoughts, feelings or behaviour in ways that agree with either a specific person, group or with social norms.

You may have found that there are times when you just ‘went along’ with the popular vote… even when you didn’t necessarily agree to it. This means that there was a unanimous decision. Having said that, it simply takes one person to disagree before every other person feels the need to do the same.

A lot of the times, people feel the need to conform because they want to be right. Instead of searching for the truth themselves, individuals stick to the crowd because it is easier and less prone to embarrassment.

One way to possibly get over the fear of being singled out is to create anonymity within the group. This can make people feel less accountable for their actions, and in a sense, allow themselves to showcase their authentic side.

Anonymity is much easier to maintain when you’re part of a large crowd, or maybe disguising themselves in some fashion.

If you google ‘how to get over conformity’, there are several articles available for you to soak up and follow through.

This is one of them: https://hbr.org/2015/10/the-high-cost-of-conformity-and-how-to-avoid-it#:~:text=Act%20or%20speak%20differently%20than,feel%20its%20impact%20on%20you. “The high cost of conformity and how to avoid it”

Have a read. What stood out to you the most? What do you still have left to practice? Do agree with the principles mentioned in the article? Do you believe your values are strong enough to avoid conformance?

While it does take a crap ton of practice, you’ve got to decide: do you wanna be a wolf or a sheep?

Mindset…

Do you ever remember the last time when everything in your day had gone horribly wrong? Were you just waiting until you could just curl up in bed and drift off to oblivion?  How about this though: instead of dwelling on the one thing that upset you, I challenge you to alter your mindset and find at least ONE positive thing that occurred. Maybe a little gratitude can help simmer down all that frustration bottled up inside.

Another thing I could recommend is to read the book “Mindset: changing the way you think to fulfil your potential.” It is an amazing bestseller written by Carol Dweck, a psychologist from Stanford University.

She mentions that emotional intelligence (EQ) is really what will get you through tough time. A strong EQ can give you the calmness and strength that is required to make important decisions and take action.

Dr Carol S. Dweck

Dweck had explored the two mindsets: ‘fixed mindset’ and ‘growth mindset.’ There’s no point giving a book report. But what you’ll realise whilst reading this book is that to achieve success, it isn’t all about being the most talented or intelligent.  

Rather, it is all about cultivating the positive mindset to become a better version of yourself. Do you think that your abilities are fixed and permanent? Or can they be developed over time? Think about it…

Just to give you some background, everyone has a bit of both mindsets in them. To have a fixed mindset is to say that “your qualities are carved in stone”, meaning that they cannot be changed. Therefore, to think your qualities can be changed is to have a growth mindset.

It is not easy to consistently be growth minded; to tell you the honest truth. It demands perseverance, ambition and humility. One thing is clear; having the right mindset is the one thing that can truly give you a sense of accomplishment.